Sunday, October 19, 2014

Curmudgeon in the Wry 570

Sunday, October 19, 2014---1171 Words---Average Reading Time: 4 Minutes, 12 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)

Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.
Continuing to call them as I see them.
Virtually free of original ideas. 
Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.
Often wrong…never in doubt.
If you want this in a different language…move to a country that speaks it!
Gluten Free.
Completely biased.
Don’t forget to floss.
Low carb.
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Rave: Woody Herman.
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Reading: “Storm Prey” by John Sandford.
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On the Hi Fi: “Personal Best” by Artie Shaw.
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Under rated: Lewis Stone.
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Quote: “The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.”---Albert Einstein
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TV Time Out: Really looking forward to the finale of “Manhattan” later this evening. So far, it’s been a good journey…hoping for a good destination. Show was renewed last week.
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Captain Obvious: The only young people you see driving Mercedes convertibles are usually blonde females.
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Golden Oldies: Remember when the world seemed to stop for the World Series? No longer…unless it is in your town.
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Numbers game: Kansas City ranked 25th out the 30 MLB teams in attendance.
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Excess blather: When it comes to sports on TV, what I want is far less pregame chatter {none would be good} from overcrowded panels whose analysis amounts to nothing.
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TV Time Out II: The three-week hiatus for “Hell on Wheels” is a good break. It’s been moving too slowly season…but at least now Cullen is finally armed and dangerous. Hope that Bohannan, Durant and Mickey can take down the provisional governor. Here’s hoping the final three episodes are filled with more western action.
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Quote: “Spike Lee is an avid Knicks fan who doesn’t know anything about basketball.”—Phil Jackson.
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Bottom Line: The song has yet to be written that doesn’t receive immense benefits from a Count Basie arrangement. Ditto for a Nelson Riddle arrangement.
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Fifth Law of Applied Terror: If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book. 
Corollary: If you are given a take-home exam, you will forget where you live.
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Bottom Line: Whatever you did, that's what you planned.--- Featherkile's Rule.
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TV Time Out III: “Gotham” is a diabolical good time. Alfred is becoming my favorite character. The cinematography, costume and set design are all top notch. Fish Mooney is way too over the top for me. Overall, I am intrigued by the series.
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Reality check: Chicken Little only has to be right once.
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Second thoughts: Just when you think you are over the hill, you find there's another hill. And it's steeper.
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Quote: “Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago.”--- Bernard Berenson
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Fast start: According to Nielsen, Fox Sports 1 is the country’s fastest growing network.
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Food for thought: How much will electricity cost once we go “all electric?”
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Hmmm: Is it bragging if it’s true?
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TV Time Out IV: “Person of Interest” is utilizing its procedural elements smartly to expand its mythology. Great seeing Elias reemerge…a most engaging character. POI handles its villains extremely well…the Brotherhood and Dominic are formidable adversaries and the perfect big baddies for this season. POI is smart, fun, strikingly ominous, and finds the correct places to inject some humor among the action and drama.
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New Normal: Florida State has spent years trying to run a university the football team can be proud of.
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Picture this: You realize that you have been phased out of the culture, when you wouldn’t wear what’s fashionable on a bet.
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Bad medicine: People who drive too slowly on interstates are worse than those who drive too fast.
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Reality check: If government employees had to live off tips, they would starve to death.
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Fun Fact: Whoever wins the World Series will have participated in five champagne celebrations.
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New definition for overkill: The George Clooney wedding.
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Factoid: There is no sense giving advice. Wise men don’t need it and fools don’t take it.
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Final TV Time Out: “The Blacklist” has so many strings and directions that could be pulled or followed, I have not a clue where season two will go. Will we see more of Berlin? Will Mossad agent, Samar Navabi get more involved? What are she and Red up to? Who has Liz locked in the closet? I enjoy the way the criminal of the weeks ties in to Red’s larger plots. “The Blacklist” characters never give a straight answer. “The X-Files” was the last show that came close to legitimizing epic covert plots on this scale for government conspiracies. Through it all, Red is the chess master in this game. Ever feel like Red magically teleports himself from place to place?
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Dollars and sense: The Yankees’ payroll is larger that the Royals and Orioles combined.
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Common Core: Bloomberg News reports the high school class of 2014 turned in the lowest math scores on the SATs since 2000.
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Stop the presses: Very few things turn out better than you expected.
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True or false: Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
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C’est la vie: All the easy problems have been solved.
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Truism: You never find the lost article until you replace it.
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Quote: “An appeaser is one who feeds an alligator in the hope it will eat him last.”—Winston Churchill.
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William Safire's Rules for Writers:
Remember to never split an infinitive.
The passive voice should never be used.
Do not put statements in the negative form.
Verbs have to agree with their subjects.
Proofread carefully to see if you words out.
If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
A writer must not shift your point of view.
And don't start a sentence with a conjunction. ( Remember, too, a preposition is a terrible word to end a sentence with.)
Don't overuse exclamation marks!!
Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.
Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
Always pick on the correct idiom.
The adverb always follows the verb.
Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague; seek viable alternatives.
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Quote: “Just because you call powerful idiots ‘the government’ doesn’t mean they’re not idiots.”---Ben Stein.
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Final Thought: No books are lost by lending except those you particularly wanted to keep.
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If you can read this, thank a teacher.
If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.
If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.
And, for everything else you have, thank God.
That is all.
As you were

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