Sunday, November 24, 2013

Curmudgeon in the Wry 555

Sunday, November 24, 2013---889 Words---Average Reading Time: 3 Minutes, 3 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)
Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.
Continuing to call them as I see them.
Virtually free of original ideas. 
Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.
Often wrong…never in doubt.
If you want this in a different language…move to a country that speaks it!
Gluten Free.
Completely biased.
Don’t forget to floss.
Low carb.
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Rave: Pied Pipers
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Reading: John Grisham’s “Sycamore Row.”
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On the Hi Fi: “The Essence of Billie Holiday.”
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Under rated: Bobby Vee.
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Rave: Nothing says it better than a gift card.
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TV Time Out: Each week on “The Blacklist” brings new questions about Red with no answers in sight. Things that we think are true are shown to be lies. The show shows little interest in obvious answers…and requires some willing suspension of disbelief. It doles out info in very small doses.
By the way---what’s with that dopey topcoat Red wears?
James Spader is sinisterly charismatic.
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Thought for the day: I know a little about a lot of things. But two things I could not begin to explain to you are fantasy football and electronic cigarettes.
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You Know You’re Old: If you remember advertisers referring to you as a “young modern.”
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Rant: There are more tattoos per square foot at Whole Foods than anyplace other than an NBA court.
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Quote: “One chord is fine. Two chords are pushing it. Three chords and you’re into jazz.”—Lou Reed.
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Rave: Bumper sticker of the month—“Don’t Steal. The Government Hates Competition.”
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Truism: Jay Carney, the bland face of progressive coercion.
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Quote: “Persistence is doing something again and again until it works. It sounds like 'pestering' for a reason.
Tenacity is using new data to make new decisions to find new pathways to find new ways to achieve a goal when the old ways didn't work.
Telemarketers are persistent, Nike is tenacious.”—Seth Godin.
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TV Time Out II: “Person of Interest” just gets better weekly. It is pure entertainment. The last two installments were flashbang episodes…loud, dizzying and stunning.
The way the writers have created a variety of forces is brilliant.
The good-guys/bad-guys paradigm is nearly three-dimensional.
Just one more show before season three break. HR went down…the Simmons resolution remains.
Is it just me…or does Robert John Burke’s character Simmons look more like RoboCop than he did when he played RoboCop?
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Truism: Those who know the most achieve the most.
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You Know You’re Old: If you remember pulling into the gas station and asking for “a dollar’s worth”---and it moved the needle on your gas gauge.
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Quote: “There are people in dialysis less dependent on machinery than obama.”—Dennis Miller.
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Update: OK! The 3 Lies Have Been Updated For 2013.
1.The Check’s in the mail.
2. I gave at the office.
3.You can keep your current health plan.
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TV Time Out III: “Revenge” could wear the balls off a pool table. The lies perpetuated not only by Emily, but also by every person coming in and out Emily’s life, have become an escalating stack of crazy.
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Lesson learned: Never buy Halloween candy in advance.
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Truism: Whatever most of America doesn’t want America’s gonna get!
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Rant: Political correctness removes the opportunity to convince someone that their thinking is misguided.
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Quote: “Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.”—Plato.
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Rave: Can’t help it…I love coeds.
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Hmmm: You can always tell the philosophy major behind the fast-food counter…he's the guy who asks why you want fries with that.
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Truism: We make mistakes a whole lot faster than we make corrections.
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TV Time Out IV: “Blue Bloods” is different from anything else on TV.
The personal and the professional have a way of merging for the Reagans.
The Reagan clan provides a powerful demonstration of love and faith in action and the sacrifices to preserve both.
“Blue Bloods” tackles the quiet moments in a way that sets it apart from the rest of what is on the tube. The dialog is eloquently written.
It’s a special show.
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You Know You’re Old: If you remember Dynaflow.
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Rave: Outstanding billboard I spotted on Southbound I-95 in South Carolina---“Our state is not an ash tray.”
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Dell & HP Customer Service: When things go wrong you never get to complain to the people who made them go wrong or can do anything about them.
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"Well, let's just be clear,": What White House spokesman Jay Carney and his boss announce when they're about to turn on the fog machine.
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Rant: For just the second time our nation’s history we have elected three consecutive presidents to second terms.
The first time we elected Jefferson, Madison and Monroe.
This time we got Clinton, George W. Bush and obama.
Does anyone require a clearer picture of America’s decline?
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Quote: “It's disappointing, but not surprising: In labor's political campaigns, truth is always the first casualty.”—Michael Saltsman, Wall Street Journal.
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Final Thought: Voter IQ worries me as much as Voter ID.
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If you can read this, thank a teacher.
If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.
If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.
That is all.

As you were.

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