Sunday, November 24, 2013

Curmudgeon in the Wry 555

Sunday, November 24, 2013---889 Words---Average Reading Time: 3 Minutes, 3 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)
Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.
Continuing to call them as I see them.
Virtually free of original ideas. 
Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.
Often wrong…never in doubt.
If you want this in a different language…move to a country that speaks it!
Gluten Free.
Completely biased.
Don’t forget to floss.
Low carb.
Rave: Pied Pipers
Reading: John Grisham’s “Sycamore Row.”
On the Hi Fi: “The Essence of Billie Holiday.”
Under rated: Bobby Vee.
Rave: Nothing says it better than a gift card.
TV Time Out: Each week on “The Blacklist” brings new questions about Red with no answers in sight. Things that we think are true are shown to be lies. The show shows little interest in obvious answers…and requires some willing suspension of disbelief. It doles out info in very small doses.
By the way---what’s with that dopey topcoat Red wears?
James Spader is sinisterly charismatic.
Thought for the day: I know a little about a lot of things. But two things I could not begin to explain to you are fantasy football and electronic cigarettes.
You Know You’re Old: If you remember advertisers referring to you as a “young modern.”
Rant: There are more tattoos per square foot at Whole Foods than anyplace other than an NBA court.
Quote: “One chord is fine. Two chords are pushing it. Three chords and you’re into jazz.”—Lou Reed.
Rave: Bumper sticker of the month—“Don’t Steal. The Government Hates Competition.”
Truism: Jay Carney, the bland face of progressive coercion.
Quote: “Persistence is doing something again and again until it works. It sounds like 'pestering' for a reason.
Tenacity is using new data to make new decisions to find new pathways to find new ways to achieve a goal when the old ways didn't work.
Telemarketers are persistent, Nike is tenacious.”—Seth Godin.
TV Time Out II: “Person of Interest” just gets better weekly. It is pure entertainment. The last two installments were flashbang episodes…loud, dizzying and stunning.
The way the writers have created a variety of forces is brilliant.
The good-guys/bad-guys paradigm is nearly three-dimensional.
Just one more show before season three break. HR went down…the Simmons resolution remains.
Is it just me…or does Robert John Burke’s character Simmons look more like RoboCop than he did when he played RoboCop?
Truism: Those who know the most achieve the most.
You Know You’re Old: If you remember pulling into the gas station and asking for “a dollar’s worth”---and it moved the needle on your gas gauge.
Quote: “There are people in dialysis less dependent on machinery than obama.”—Dennis Miller.
Update: OK! The 3 Lies Have Been Updated For 2013.
1.The Check’s in the mail.
2. I gave at the office.
3.You can keep your current health plan.
TV Time Out III: “Revenge” could wear the balls off a pool table. The lies perpetuated not only by Emily, but also by every person coming in and out Emily’s life, have become an escalating stack of crazy.
Lesson learned: Never buy Halloween candy in advance.
Truism: Whatever most of America doesn’t want America’s gonna get!
Rant: Political correctness removes the opportunity to convince someone that their thinking is misguided.
Quote: “Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.”—Plato.
Rave: Can’t help it…I love coeds.
Hmmm: You can always tell the philosophy major behind the fast-food counter…he's the guy who asks why you want fries with that.
Truism: We make mistakes a whole lot faster than we make corrections.
TV Time Out IV: “Blue Bloods” is different from anything else on TV.
The personal and the professional have a way of merging for the Reagans.
The Reagan clan provides a powerful demonstration of love and faith in action and the sacrifices to preserve both.
“Blue Bloods” tackles the quiet moments in a way that sets it apart from the rest of what is on the tube. The dialog is eloquently written.
It’s a special show.
You Know You’re Old: If you remember Dynaflow.
Rave: Outstanding billboard I spotted on Southbound I-95 in South Carolina---“Our state is not an ash tray.”
Dell & HP Customer Service: When things go wrong you never get to complain to the people who made them go wrong or can do anything about them.
"Well, let's just be clear,": What White House spokesman Jay Carney and his boss announce when they're about to turn on the fog machine.
Rant: For just the second time our nation’s history we have elected three consecutive presidents to second terms.
The first time we elected Jefferson, Madison and Monroe.
This time we got Clinton, George W. Bush and obama.
Does anyone require a clearer picture of America’s decline?
Quote: “It's disappointing, but not surprising: In labor's political campaigns, truth is always the first casualty.”—Michael Saltsman, Wall Street Journal.
Final Thought: Voter IQ worries me as much as Voter ID.
If you can read this, thank a teacher.
If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.
If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.
That is all.

As you were.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Welcome to Bracketville--Game On Edition

The best thing about the college basketball off season…is that it ends.
And it has!
Last season, Duke point guard Tyler Thornton committed just 38 turnovers in 791 minutes.
“Basketball is a game of deception.”---Davidson head coach, Bob McKillop.
Duke was 213th in the country in rebounding last year…and that was with Mason Plumlee and Ryan Kelly. Ooops!
Colorado returns four starters.
Butler, VCU, Gonzaga and Davidson prove that roster continuity with solid players can compete with bigger one-and-done type teams.
In their opening game loss to USC-Upstate, Virginia Tech failed to score in the last four minutes of the game - at home.
The Duke women have five seniors and five players 6-3 or taller in the rotation. And, that does not include starting sophomore guard (and future All American), Alexis Jones.
They start four players with at least 1,000 points so far in their careers.
6’3” Junior Center, Elizabeth Williams had at least one blocked shot in every one of her first 69 Duke games. Cal broke the streak in this season’s opener.
Kentucky’s four freshmen shot a combined 13-33 in their debut…the three Kansas freshmen went 8-18. Duke’s Jabari Parker went 8-10 and grabber six rebounds.
You must remember this: The first nationally televised prime-time regular season college basketball game was played in the Astrodome. Houston upset UCLA, ending UCLA’s 47-game winning streak.
Duke will be on an ESPN network 26 times this season…more than any other college or NBA team.
Last season the national possessions per game was 65.9. In the 1990-91 season it was 75.3.
This season there are four new Division I teams…bringing the total to 351.
Bo Ryan has had 10 seasons of 20-plus wins in his 12 seasons at Wisconsin. In the 103 seasons before Ryan, the Badgers had  just four 20-plus win seasons.
Time flys: Doesn’t seem possible that this will be Bill Self’s tenth season coaching Kansas, does it? In that time he has won nine Big 12 championships in a row.
Only one team has made it to the Sweet Sixteen in each of the past four years---Ohio State.
Top four head coaches in current consecutive season leading their team to NCAA Tournament: Coach K (18), Tom Izzo (16), Bill Self (15) and Gonzaga’s Mark Few with 14.
Last season Michigan State had more turnovers than assists.
Boise State brings everyone back from last year’s NCAA Tournament team.
Not so fast: Of the 17 national titles won by active coaches, seven reside in the ACC---Coach K has four, UNC’s Roy Williams a pair and Syracuse’s Jim Boeheim has one.
One more thing: Nebraska opens up a new arena this season…every game is sold out.

Congratulations! You made it to the end -- celebrate by watching some basketball.