Saturday, August 17, 2013

Curmudgeon in the Wry 547


Saturday, August 17, 2013---644 Words---Average Reading Time: 2 Minutes, 5 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)
Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.
Chock full of extraneous intensifiers.
If you don’t have more questions than answers, you are not really living.
Continuing to call them as I see them.
Virtually free of original ideas. 
Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.
Often wrong…never in doubt.
If you want this in a different language…move to a country that speaks it!
Gluten Free.
Providing snap judgments and overreactions.
Filled with random nonsense.
Completely biased.
Don’t forget to floss.
+++++++
Rave: Judge Jeanine
+++++++
Reading: “The Highway” by C.J. Box.
+++++++
On the Hi Fi: “Only Standard Time”---A Chuck Thagard collection.
+++++++
Under rated: Liltin’ Martha Tilton
+++++++
Numbers game: The easiest password for a woman to remember is her anniversary date---that, of course, thwarts hubby from hacking her account.
+++++++
Hmmm: If they can make watches waterproof---why can’t they make cell phones waterproof as well?
+++++++
Truism: Humphrey Bogart was the prototype for the “Most Interesting Man in the World.”
+++++++
TV Timeout: The series finale for “Burn Notice” airs Sept 12…just three episodes remaining.
+++++++
Rant: The A-Rod/Yankees saga is the worst reality show ever.
+++++++
Rimshot: Alcohol and calculus don’t mix…so don’t drink and derive.
+++++++
Idle thought: It is a sound of the times when the two happiest words in college and pro football are “charges dropped.”
+++++++
Quote: “Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance and the gospel of envy. Its inherent virtue is the sharing of misery.”—Winston Churchill.
+++++++
Truism: Never loan anything you ever want to see again, because you probably won’t.
+++++++
Hmmm: Is it politically correct to bring up how absurd being politically correct is?
+++++++
Ever notice: When you’re talking with someone who went to Harvard, it comes up very early in the conversation.
+++++++
+++++++
Quote: “You never retire from show business…your phone just stops ringing.”—Nelson Riddle.
+++++++
Rave: “Suits” just might be the most purely entertaining series on the tube.
+++++++
Truism: You're not going to win every game. You're not going to lose every game, either.
+++++++
Pop Quiz: Do you listen to TV or watch it?
+++++++
My question: Why would the US ever belong to any group—be it the G8 or the U.N.—in which Russia has veto power?
+++++++
You Know You’re Old: If you had a pen pal.
+++++++
Truism: You can either be truthful or politically correct---but not both.
+++++++
Anthony Weiner: The Underwear Bomber.
+++++++
Rant: obama has become the Innocent-Bystander-in-Chief.
+++++++
Truism: In the very best movies, the very best TV shows, the very best books we really do treat the characters as if they are real people, people we wish to know, people we want to be friends with.
+++++++
Hmmm: Just because it is popular doesn’t make it art.
+++++++
Corporate Truism: The more powerful you are, the funnier you appear to those who surround you.
+++++++
Quote: “It’s not that academic types are terrible people, it’s that they have little or no life experience that enables them to base their opinions on anything other than theory. And the trouble with theories is that they are unproven.”—Burt Prelutsky.
+++++++
Ever notice: Men are still men---women have become persons.
+++++++
Idle thought: 32 years ago MTV launched---vowing to kill the radio star and it didn't because in the 21st century it basically killed itself.
+++++++
Hmmm: If you live just for today, and today is not a good day…what then?
+++++++
Final Thought: Detroit has had a democrat mayor for the last 51 years.
+++++++
If you can read this, thank a teacher.
If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.
If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.
That is all.
As you were.