Saturday, September 10, 2011

Curmudgeon in the Wry 509

Saturday, September 10, 2011---559 Words---Average Reading Time: 1 Minute, 56 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)

Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.

Continuing to call them as I see them.

Virtually free of original ideas.

Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.

Often wrong…never in doubt.

Being wrong is the risk you run by thinking and acting.

A Grumpy Old Man Production.

If you want this in a different language…move to a country that speaks it!

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Rave: Dorothy Malone.

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Reading: “Back of Beyond” by C.J. Box.

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On the Hi Fi: “The Look of Love” by Diana Krall.

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Under rated: Jack Elam.

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I miss: Miles Davis, Peter Lorre, Mickey Vernon.

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Rave: Ben Johnson made every movie he was in better.

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Truism: The end of the world will not be covered any more extensively than Hurricane Irene.

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Stats: The New England Patriots have won 35 games in the past three years; yet have not won a playoff game.

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Quote: “Too many student-athletes are stupid and only in college because they can dunk a basketball, sack a quarterback or turn a double play. So they say and do stupid things all the time, and social media has a way of exposing it to the world.”—Gary Parrish, CBS Sports.

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Didjaknow: McDonald’s started naming their All-American High School Basketball teams in 1978.

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Rave: As much as I enjoy today’s tennis with the Sisters Williams, Roger Federer, Rafael Nadal, Andy Murray, Novak Djokovic, Caroline Wozniacki and Maria Sharapova…McEnroe vs. Borg was the best ever.

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Another Truism: Scholarship athletes do get paid---it is called a college education.

It’s what happens when scholarships are given to athletes academically unqualified for admission.

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Hmmm: How come every one of Dagwood’s shirts has just a single big button? And, for that matter, why do they keep encouraging Beetle Bailey to re-enlist?

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But who’s counting: Doesn’t seem to me that it has been fifty years since Roger Maris hit 61 home runs to break the record of Babe Ruth…if you’re scoring at home.

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Hmmm: The Big Ten has 12 teams and the Big 12 has ten.

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Quote: "The environmentalists are for any energy source unless it actually works.”--Stephen Hayward, an energy expert at the American Enterprise Institute.

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Rave: Best answer I have heard to questions about gun control---“Use two hands.”

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Yet Another Truism: The sad reality is that for many of the kids being paraded around on ESPN, the past couple of weeks of this Little League World Series will be the highpoint of their athletic lives.

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R.I.P.: Mike Flanagan was an Oriole thru and thru, had a just incredible wit and played baseball the right way. Very few like him will grace the ball fields now and in the future.

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Quote: “Everything could be relevant. Everything matters---until it doesn’t.” Mystery author Laura Lippman on one of her rules for writing crime fiction. As in life, as well---so say I.

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Even Yet Another Truism: The world was a better place before anyone heard of “multi-tasking.”

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Hmmm: A moron with a computer is still a moron. Same goes for a moron with a teleprompter.

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If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.

If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.

That is all.

As you were.

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