Saturday, June 25, 2011

Curmudgeon in the Wry 504

Saturday, June 25, 2011---600 Words---Average Reading Time: 2 Minutes, 4 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)

Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.

Continuing to call them as I see them.

Virtually free of original ideas.

Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.

Often wrong…never in doubt.

Being wrong is the risk you run by thinking and acting.

A Grumpy Old Man Production.

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Rave: Hoot Gibson.

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Reading: "A Catskill Eagle" by Robert B. Parker (1985).

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On the Hi Fi: “Sarah Vaughn at Mister Kelly’s.

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Under rated: Guy Madison.

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I miss: Ava Gardner, Benny Goodman, Bob Cousy, Ross Macdonald.

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Rant: Add this to the big lie list---"we have an unusually high volume of calls today, so your hold time will be XX. X hours." Thanks, Bonnie.

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Another big lie: “The Libya intervention will last days, not weeks.” From the whopper-teller-in-chief obama.

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Rave: Wimbledon coverage on ESPN…wonderful announcers and analysts.

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Rant: BYU’s Jimmer Fredette will be playing for Sacramento Kings, meaning he’ll be rumor for those of us on the East Coast.

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Didjaknow: The last time both players used wooden tennis rackets in a Grand Slam event was in the 1984 U.S. Open semi-finals---John McEnroe defeated Pat Cash and went on to best Ivan Lendl in straight sets for his seventh U.S. Open title.

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Home improvement: Don’t forget—righty tighty, lefty loosey.

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Hmmm: How did Heinz get us to believe the tougher it is to get out of the bottle the better the ketchup is.

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Time Capsule: You know life is a fast break when you see “The Fonz” is now a spokesman for retirement plans and reverse mortgages.

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Hmmm: Is it true that when obama’s poll numbers recently hit lows, a great many Kenyans began insisting that he was born in Hawaii?

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Snake eyes plus: We still have 11-1-11 and 11-11-11 to look forward to in 2011.

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Try this at home: Take the last two digits of your birth year and add them to the age you'll be this year. Everyone should arrive at 111.

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Truism: Three’s a crowd. Four’s a dinner party.

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Rant: NATO is an increasingly fictitious military organization.

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Truism: If business were done for the customer rather than the business there wouldn’t be a recession.

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Idle thought: Watching golf on TV gives one plenty of time to contemplate the trivial. For example, those wide, white belts some players wear with their dark slacks. On the pro tour, the 70’s never go out of style.

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Rave: Overachievers---2001 Patriots, 2004 Red Sox and the 2011 Bruins.

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Rave: If you turned Boston Bruin goalie Tim Thomas’s hockey story into a movie, no one would believe it.

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Business 101: Most people know what they are already doing, not what they should be doing.

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Truism: All politics are local? So are sports.

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Insanity: Due to union contracts, seven bus drivers in Wisconsin took home in excess off $100,000.00. Jackie Gleason didn’t make that much playing Ralph Kramden on “The Honeymooners.”

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Quote: “Whether obama is simply incompetent as President or has some hidden agenda to undermine this country, at home and abroad, he has nearly everything he needs to ruin America, including a fool for a vice president.”—Economist Thomas Sowell.

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Stats: Just ten guys have both played for an NBA championship team and coached one.

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Rant: You can start the showing of “Green Lantern” without me.

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If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.

If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.

That is all.

As you were.

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