Saturday, July 12, 2008

Curmudgeon in the Wry 395

Tuesday, July 08, 2008---776 Words---Average reading time: 2-minutes, 51 seconds (time frittered away) (a pointless waste of time)
Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.
Almost completely free of original ideas.
Often wrong…never in doubt.
Cynicism is my beat.
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Rave: Alan Ladd
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On the Hi Fi: Elvis---“The Complete 50’s Masters.”
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Reading: “The Ivory Grin” (1952) by Ross Macdonald. It is part of his Lew Archer series. His 1949 Archer novel, “The Moving target” was the basis for Paul Newman’s 1966 flick, “Harper.” In 1975, Mr. Newman reprised the role in “The Drowning Pool”---written in 1950.
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Must see TV: “Burn Notice” returns on the USA Network at 10 PM this Thursday. It is a tightly written comedy-drama about a fired (“burned”) spy who ends up in Miami Beach. Great cast and second banana Bruce Campbell steals lotsa scenes. Better than anything on network TV.
The DVD for Season 1 came out June 17th.
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Must see TV, part II: AMC’s polished original program, the 1960’s-era drama “Mad Men,” returns for season two on July 27th.
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Rave: Don’t know about you, but after the Supreme Court decision on the DC gun control, I celebrated by going out to the shooting range.
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Quote: “The lucky writers are those who can outwrite their readers without outthinking them.” ---Raymond Chandler.
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Hmmm: When the guy paid $20 million to ride the next shuttle, did they charge him $25 to check his bag, $3 for peanuts and $5 for a Coke, etc.?
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Rant: Every time that botoxed liberal Pelosi opens her mouth I feel like Charlton Heston’s character in “Planet of the Apes” must have felt when he learned the apes were at the top of the food chain.
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Renaissance Man: Ben Stein.
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Rave: I would like it if Joe Horn lived next door to me.
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Rant: Weasely Clark turned “Face the Nation” into “Disgrace the Nation” with his uncalled for comments concerning Vietnam War hero John McCain. Bob Schieffer was caught off guard by the Weasely’s slam and was clearly astonished. I have often thought Weasely got his commission on-line.
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Rave: I do not think anybody “gets” the Wimbledon tradition better that Roger Federer, Rafa Nadal and the Williams sisters.
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More Wimbledon: No one plays harder than Rafael Nadal does…he is almost like a linebacker. However, those Capri pants he wears are a tad ridiculous. Betcha Nike sells a bunch of the muscle shirt he wore during the tournament.
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Rave: Enjoying the match between Venus and Serena is watching history. Never again will we see two sisters win as many combined singles titles (16) as these classy women.
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Rave: No matter the country of origin of the Wimbledon players that turn up in the interview room, they speak great English. No need to press one for English with these athletes. They are far easier to understand than the tech support folks you get from the computer and Internet providers. It begs the question…if these ladies and gentlemen who are not US citizens can make the effort to learn the language, why can’t those who have chosen to make the US their home do likewise?
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Rave: As long as they stay healthy, the sisters Williams have committed to playing both singles and doubles for the USA in the 2008 Olympics. That gives us hope in women’s tennis, men’s basketball, men’s swimming and one event in women’s swimming (Dara Torres).
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Stats: The past weekend’s Red Sox/Yankee series marked the first time since 1997 the AL East rival have played when neither was in first place. Congrats to the new look Tampa Bay Rays for that stat!
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One can only hope: The cretin Barry Bonds has said he will boycott the Hall of Fame if his asterisk-stained 756th home run ball is displayed with an asterisk. Promise or threat?
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Hmmm: The only discipline Don Imus deserves for his remarks about Pacman Jones ought to be for turning that cretin into a victim momentarily.
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Rant: Last time I checked the country had exactly one National Anthem.
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Rant: When I learned the hot dog eating contest between Joey Chestnut and Takeru Kobayashi ended in a tie that necessitated a five-dog overtime, I just assumed it was pretty much the same as a penalty kick in soccer.
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Changing times: Michael Phelps will be in the hunt for eight gold medals in Beijing. If this were the 1930’s, he would be on his sixth Tarzan movie by now.
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If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English thank a Veteran.
That is all.
As you were.
We return you to your regular programming

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