Friday, June 22, 2007

Curmudgeon in the Wry 352

Friday, June 22, 2007---868 Words---Average reading time: 2-minutes, 54 seconds (time frittered away)
Offending readers one issue at a time since 2001.
Almost completely free of original ideas.
Often wrong…but never in doubt.
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Rave: Dennis Miller
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On the Victrola: Toni Tennille “Sings Big Band”.
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Reading: “Lying With Strangers” by James Grippando.
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Full Disclosure: President Bush’s carping and insisting the Amnesty Bill get passed, has driven me from the Republican Party. I have registered as an Independent…and hope Lou Dobbs runs for POTUS.
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Get a grip: Paris Hilton whines about going to jail. Kobe Bryant’s whining that playing for the Lakers is similar to house arrest. These two self absorbed jerks need to toughen up. They are leading the league in pathetic!
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Rant: We are living under the tyranny of Political Correctness.
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Rave: The Xerox “I came to fix the mute button” is my favorite TV spot currently in rotation.
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Hmmm: Isn’t all salt sea salt? And isn’t oil really a bio fuel?
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Rant: College basketball games that tip off at 9 PM
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Rave: Among my favorite Hollywood sound effects are the giant ants screeching in “Them” and the “thwack” of the arrows in the archery competition in “Robin Hood” starring Errol Flynn (the only Robin Hood who counts). What are yours?
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Truism: Retirement is the period in life when you finally stop quoting the proverb that time is money.
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Book Bits: Joe Pickett is a 21st century cowboy hero in C.J. Box’s seven (and counting) book series. “Free Fire” is an intensely taut tale set in Yellowstone National Park.
Joe signs on to be a special undercover investigator for the Governor. Working without a net, Joe unearths a wide conspiracy and finds no one to trust with his findings.
It is a nonstop, can’t put down, just one more chapter read that has me nominating C.J. Box as one of the mystery/thriller genre’s most underappreciated writers.
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Rant: One would hope that expiration date has occurred for the (over)use of the word issues. Newspapers and magazines have issues. If people are FUBAR, they have a problem, not an issue. Let’s call a spade a spade…enough with the PC speech.
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Rave: It’s a tough call, but I know that the music from “The Guns of Navarone” and “The Magnificent Seven” are in my Top Five movie soundtracks. And yours?
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Didjaknow: John Travolta turned down the starring roles in both “Tootsie” and “An Officer and a Gentleman.”
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Book Bits: I am part of the minority that enjoys the Sunny Randall series from Robert B. Parker.
However, I must say that “Spare Change” is not a keeper.
The most important plot is most interesting and could carry the book.
But…please… show me mercy and reduce the time devoted to the dog and visits to the shrink…especially when the shrink is the wearisome Susan Silverman from the “Spenser” series.
What should have been a clever and compelling tale gets bogged down with the unessential.
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Rant: Major League Baseball continues to get it wrong in the name of TV…MLB just rolls over for Fox. Game 7 of the 2007 World Series is set for November 1…the start has been moved from Saturday to Wednesday. That leaves nine days between the end of the National League Championship and the first pitch of the World Series.
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You betcha: When the Red Sox look in the rear view mirror, the Yankees are “closer than they appear.”
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Hmmm: What is up with that orange cauliflower in the produce section?
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Book Bits: If you like the con game, the caper or the grand scam…then Matthew Klein’s “Con Ed” is a must read.
It is “The Sting” brought up to date in Silicon Valley
The plot (con) is tighter than a tick. You are hooked from page one to the most satisfying payoff.
The con is intricate…but never confusing…you simply never know who is scamming who.
It is a smart, witty, amusing and clever narrative with never a dull moment.
I figured out the Judas in protagonist’s camp early on. When that happens I always wonder if it is because I am guessing luckily, am smart enough to apply to Mensa or if the writer is not so gifted. In “Con Ed” it is not the latter option.
It is big fun to be the mark and get roped in by “Con Ed.”
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Rant: I sure do find Angelina Jolie tedious.
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Rave: Hats off to Mike Lupica who continues to declare his friendship thru thick and thin to Don Imus in his newspaper columns.
Free Don Imus!
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Rant: The Imus replacement attempts MSNBC has tried have been uniformly pathetic.
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Truism: If you were scoring at home you would have to score the ratings for the NBA Finals an “air ball.”
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More NBA: Methinks LeBron needs to spend more time this off season working on his jump shot and less time filming commercials.
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Rant: Neck tattoos on athletes. Actually neck tattoos on anyone. No, actually any tattoo.
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If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English thank a Veteran.
That is all.
As you were.










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