Curmudgeon in the Wry 524

Thursday, May 17, 2012---757 Words---Average Reading Time: 2 Minutes, 26 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)

Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.

Continuing to call them as I see them.

Virtually free of original ideas.

Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.

Often wrong…never in doubt.

Being wrong is the risk you run by thinking and acting.

A Grumpy Old Man Production.         

If you want this in a different language…move to a country that speaks it!

Gluten Free.

Why waste your time anywhere else.

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Rave: 50^th High School Reunions.

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Reading: “Over Time” by Gilman grad Frank Deford.

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On the Hi Fi: “ Poetics of Sound” by Miles Davis.

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Under rated: Stuart Varney.

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I miss: Johnny Unitas, Joel McCrea, Sarah Vaughn, Alfred Hitchcock.

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Rave: I believe baseball looks better on Radio. Even better on the car radio.

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Hmmm: obama’s “all of the above” energy policy means everything except coal, oil and nuclear power.

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Quote: “If the past sits in judgment on the present, the future will be lost.”—Sir Winston Churchill.

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Didjaknow: Twas Ben Franklin who named the Gulf Stream.

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Truism: “No tears for the writer, no tears for the reader.”—Robert Frost.

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Hmmm: I was completely shocked and blindsided by Seth Greenberg's comment that he was "completely shocked and blindsided" by his dismissal as coach of men’s basketball at Virginia Tech.

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Quote: “Putting your phone away and paying attention to those talking to you? There's an App for that. It's called ‘RESPECT.’”—Jim Maloy.

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Pop quiz: Giving to charity is a great American tradition. Since the Clinton Presidency, of the men who held the office of POTUS and VP, who do you think was the most generous? It was that meany Dick Cheney, who in 2005 donated 77% of his income to charity. In contrast, Al Gore (1997) ponied up all of $353.

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Truism: Whenever you fail, you usually know the exact reason you did. When you succeed you can never quite figure out what it was that went right.

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Another truism: Remember when “My Generation” was a song about young people. Now it’s just an oldie to a bunch of us who didn’t die before we got old.

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Fact: In the first 11 quarters since the recession officially ended in mid-2009, quarterly growth has averaged 2.4%. The first 11 quarters of the Reagan expansion in the 1980s, by notable contrast, grew an average of 6.1%.

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Fact: obama’s Keynesians pushed government spending…they're the ones who said we needed the "temporary, targeted" demand-side spending blitz. We were promised a roaring recovery, even though the Keynesian theory of economics had batted 0.000 in the past.

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Hmmm: Gee, maybe there is something to Reaganomics. You remember: supply-side economics, trickle-down, lower taxes, fewer regulations and the Laffer Curve.

obama has never explained why the Reagan recovery that followed policies obama rejected was so robust while the current recovery is so anemic.

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Rave: “The Glades,” “Suits,” “Royal Pains, “Burn Notice,” “White Collar,” “Necessary Roughness” and “Covert Affairs” are returning this summer…starting with “The Glades” on 6/3 at 9 PM (A&E).

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Rant: The geniuses at CBS cancelling “Unforgettable” and “NYC 22.”

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Didjaknow: Frank Morrison was Mickey Spillane’s given name.

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Rant: So, Nabisco has dropped the fig from Fig Newton. What a crock. They will always be Fig Newtons to me.

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Stats: A recent Google survey shows that conservatives give twice the amount to charity, as do libs.

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Rave: I will truly miss “In Plain Sight” on the USA Network. Their ensemble cast was top drawer on every level…great chemistry, interesting weekly plot lines, a captivating story arc…nice setting and good writing. They quit when they were ahead. The program never jumped the shark.

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Even another truism: The only time a politician is referred to as a statesman is in his obituary.

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Who Knew: Florida places three cities in Amazon’s Top 20 Most Well-Read Cities list. Miami #6, Gainesville #8 and Orlando at # 14.

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Quote: “America rarely retreats from a new frontier. Yet today we can’t even do what John Glenn did in 1962, let alone fly a circa-1980 shuttle.”—Charles Krauthammer.

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The truisms just keep on coming: If you feed a stray cat, you have a pet for life.

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One last thing: Women you love age like fine wine. Not true about the others though.

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If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.

If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.

That is all.

As you were.

Curmudgeon in the Wry 523

Saturday, April 21, 2012---600 Words---Average Reading Time: 2 Minutes, 1 Second. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)

Why waste your time anywhere else.

Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.

Continuing to call them as I see them.

Virtually free of original ideas.

Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.

Often wrong…never in doubt.

Being wrong is the risk you run by thinking and acting.

A Grumpy Old Man Production.            

If you want this in a different language…move to a country that speaks it!

Gluten Free.

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Rave: Charles Payne…one smart dude.

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Reading: “Hit Lit” by James W. Hall. A tour de force.

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On the Hi Fi: “Phil Woods Live.”

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Under rated: John Payne.

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I miss: Miles Davis, Ava Gardner, Barry Fitzgerald.

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Rave: Turner Classic Movies has named Joel McCrea Star of the Month. Two nights (May 23 and 30) are dedicated to his incredibly authentic westerns

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Quote: “The only place people read books they are not interested in is college.”—Les Standiford. To that I would add English class in private schools.

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Quote: “When you think about it, every photo of everybody is from when they were younger.”---“Pickles” comic strip (4/21/12).

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Rimshot: Mandate = Two guys watching ESPN.

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Hmmm: The Chevy Volt is just as unappealing as was the Edsel in its day. The major difference is that Ford created their lemon on their own dime, and that the Volt’s $40,000 price tag costs several times as much as the Edsel.

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Rave: Burn Notice returns with all-new episodes, June 14th, 2012.

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Guess What: Half the glass is empty.

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Factoid: “Since 2009, there have been twice as many dropouts from the economy as jobs added.”—Fred Barnes.

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Quote: “If I’m a lousy writer, then a hell of a lot of people have got lousy taste.”—Grace Metalious, author of mega-bestseller, “Peyton Place.”

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Didjaknow: 85% of the workforce in the construction industry is nonunion by choice.

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Rave: I like it when filmmakers run credits at the beginning, mainly telling you who's in it. A lot of directors no longer do that.

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Rant: Meanwhile, movie sound effects are out of control.

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Quote: "Apparently, I'm supposed to be more angry about what Mitt Romney does with his money than what barack obama does with mine."-- David Burge

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Quote: "The box score is the catechism of baseball, ready to surrender its truth to the knowing eye." - Author Stanley Cohen in The Man in the Crowd (1981).

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Truism: The mainstream media will give obama more publicity than Mitt Romney can ever purchase.

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Rave: Due to all the titles she won and her place in women's basketball, no coach has ever been more fittingly named than Pat Summitt.

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Another Truism: The “secret” ingredient is usually either sugar or butter.

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Quote: “ Paradise is exactly like where you are right now... only much, much better.” -- Laurie Anderson.

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Yet another Truism: After an instrument has been assembled, extra components will be found on the bench.

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Huh?: SMU, still located in Dallas last I checked, joins the Big East Conference in 2013. Makes about as much sense as most conference moves these days.

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Hmmm: obamanomics = If it doesn’t work, then double down.

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TV timeout: I'm not interested in NFL mock drafts, but every chance I get, I like to mock ESPN's predraft hype.

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One last thing: Everything that is central to you is peripheral to everyone else.

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If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.

If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.

That is all.

As you were.

Curmudgeon in the Wry 522

Saturday, April 14, 2012---1146 Words---Average Reading Time: 4 Minutes, 12 Seconds. (A pointless waste of time---time frittered away)

Offending readers and hindering productivity one issue at a time since 2001.

Continuing to call them as I see them.

Virtually free of original ideas.

Warning: Contains unsound bites from the apple of life.

Often wrong…never in doubt.

Being wrong is the risk you run by thinking and acting.

A Grumpy Old Man Production.

If you want this in a different language

…move to a country that speaks it!

Gluten Free.

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Rave: Carole Lombard.

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Reading: “Fun and Games” by Duane Swierczynski. Most entertaining.

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On the Hi Fi: “Blue Note, Blend 2”---a Starbucks compilation.

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Under rated: Conrad Veidt.

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I miss: Carmen Miranda, Buster Crabbe, Nat King Cole,

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Rant: Product placement gone mad as James Bond will be shown drinking Heineken beer---not sipping a martini. I am both shaken and stirred (up) over this one. Not only have the Bond movies pretty much sucked without Sean Connery, now a true pop culture icon has been bastardized. What’s next---will we see Nick and Nora Charles having a Bud in (the sure to be awful) Thin Man remake with Johnny Depp?

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Rave: I love “Blue Bloods.” A couple of observations. Gregory Jbara who portrays Commissioner Reagan’s public relations point-man is vastly under-rated and always carries a scene. Loved the mantra of family patriarch, Henry Reagan, “It’s what you do next that counts.” Is it just me, or do the Reagan family dinner scenes seem much too short?

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Quote: “Give a man a fish and he'll ask for a lemon. Teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Friday.” – Anon.

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You know you’re old: If you ever changed a typewriter ribbon.

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Rave: Happy Birthday, Oreo! One hundred years and counting. The company that makes this popular cookie sandwich was founded on March 6, 1912.

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Hmmm: Is there anything left that is not iconic?

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Rant: Red Auerbach claimed, “9 out of 10 great Basketball Players will end their career ungraciously.” Today, I’d say way too many NBA players are playing their careers ungraciously.

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Truism: Savvy TV viewers know that nothing learned in the first twenty minutes of a detective show winds up being true.

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Hmmm: Even if you’re not into it how can you resist reading your Horoscope on your Birthday.

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You know you’re old: If you think self-esteem is earned rather than a birthright.

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Quote: “Big government makes us all small.”—John Stossel.

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Rave: When I was a kid in grade school, each classroom had its own library. I got hooked on biographies and mysteries. I read an uncountable number of Hardy Boys. How lucky was I?

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Hmmm: Do Eddie Murphy and Nicolas Cage choose the crummy movies they do on purpose or are they just stupid?

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Rant: The socialist-in-chief (who knows zip about economics) keeps insisting that we have just 22 billion barrels of oil in reserve, when the government’s own geological experts put the figure at one trillion barrels. Now, it’s one thing to use guesswork while picking one’s brackets in a basketball tournament, but quite another matter when you use a crystal ball when estimating oil reserves and miss by 978,000,000,000 barrels! Guess he lacks a comprehension of statistics and math as well.

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Truisms: Wisdom is an acquired intellect, which unfortunately can only be gained by growing old.

The real problem with “Politically Correct” is we no longer know what anybody is really thinking.

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Prelutsky’s Law: “A period of idleness will expand to meet the length of time that unemployment compensation is paid.”

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Quote: “That’s the beauty of reading for pleasure. When you turn the final page and shut the book, that heady blend of sadness and joy you feel can quickly ripen into a hunger for more. I like to think of bestsellers as a gateway drug. Once you’ve found one you love, books will forever hold a special allure. All comers welcome. No special education required.”—James W. Hall, Florida Mystery Writer Extraordinaire.

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Rant: Now we see the regime has moved on from hope and change to “hope to change the subject.”

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Truism: A false sense of security is worse than none at all.

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Rim Shots: Man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "I'll have a beer, please — and one for the road." … Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar — they sit, they drink, they leave.

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Truisms: Taxpayers are not subsidizing “big oil.” “Big oil” is now a lot smaller than it was twenty years ago. They provide an essential product at a market price. They do not fix prices. They employ millions. They provide a comfortable way to travel to hundreds of millions. Infinitely more of the price you pay at the pump goes to the government than to “big oil’s” bottom line…infinitely more.

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Much ado about nothing: Anybody who gets all tingly over the release of the NFL exhibition schedule should be forced to attend a few of those games.

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Rant: The socialist-in-chief’s Department of Energy has repealed the law of supply and demand.

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Another birthday greeting: “Casablanca” celebrates number 70. They don’t make them like that any more…and let us pray that Hollywood never attempts a remake.

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You know you’re old: If you remember when being a Democrat meant being anti-Communist.

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Rave: Roger Federer is graceful and sublime, a gentleman in the world of professional sports; a true anomaly. Quite the refreshing change from the gangsters in the NBA and the headhunters in the NFL.

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Just asking: Do you know anyone who drives or is shopping for a Chevy Volt?

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Quote: From World Renown Economist Thomas Sowell: “The track record of obama's pronouncements on a wide range of issues suggests that anything he says is a message written in sand, and easily blown away by the next political winds. Remember the ‘shovel-ready projects.’”

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Another profound quote from Dr. Sowell: It would be hard to become nostalgic about Richard Nixon, who was forced to resign in disgrace. But at least you could tell when he was lying. obama’s lies are just as big, but not as visible, and the media that exposed Nixon is covering for obama.

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Truism: At least once a year Rush Limbaugh does something controversial which gets the liberal fools to talk about him...that just causes a whole bunch of folks who grew weary of him to check his show out once again.

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You know you’re old: If you ever got out of the car to open the garage door.

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One last thing: If you were an Israeli, how willing would you be to risk your national survival on Obama's promise to stand by your country?

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If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you can’t, thank the teacher’s union.

If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran.

That is all.

As you were.

Welcome to Bracketville---My Old Kentucky Home Edition

Eddie grabs the brass ring!

This year really proved how valuable getting the latter rounds correct can be. Mediocre starts by Chuck, Luke Winn, Seth Davis and yours truly were overcome by logging in 24 points in the last five games.

Of course, Eddie proved it's always better to get a bunch correct at every stage of the bracket.

I could go on and on about UK's eight point victory, but all I need to say is that they very, very good. They hustle the entire 40 minutes, are unselfish, defend, pass exceptional well and play a team game.

Davis and MKG are a joy to watch…and neither one has a single tattoo…hard not to like them, no matter who your favorite team is.

Say what you want about Coach Cal and his explotation of the one-and-done situation, but he didn't invent it---be simply has adapted better than anyone else.

I detest the rule, right up there with the alternate possession on tie-ups and being subjected to Clark Kellogg.

However, as long as it is there, a coach is a fool not to use it to his advantage. Just remember, certain coaches adapted faster to the three-point-shot than others (a certain guy with a difficult name to spell beginning with K was an early adapter on that one).

No one-and-done in the women's game, and that's a big reason why I enjoy their game.

Tonight I'll be cheering for Skylar Diggins and the girls from Notre Dame. Go Irish!

Welcome to Bracketville---Final Four Wrap-Up Edition

Take a bow Eddie!

Even if Kentucky throws a shutout at Kansas, no one has a mathematical chance to match Eddie’s 79 points. To this point, both Eddie and Tony have picked 41 winners…the spread in points shows that it is the journey, not just the destination that makes the difference in the outcome.

If Anthony Davis didn’t block their shots, Louisville had to alter their shots. Really now---he blocked shots from the paint to the three-point-arc. Wow! He’s a true game-changer…there is no answer for him in college basketball.

Davis and Michael Kidd-Gilchrist are two extraordinary athletes, and watching them play is a pleasure. Neither one takes a play off.

It was a drag that MKG had early foul trouble in each half---that deprived us from watching a special player. What a treat it is to watch him move without the ball on offense, working through block after block. He is just relentless.

Would you rather have a player like Davis and MKG or a slacker like Harrison Barnes?

Additionally, Darius Miller and Deron Lamb made major contributions to UK’s cause.

Louisville was no Forrest Gump. They took 20 more shots than UK and outrebounded the Cats. Louisville did not go quietly into the night.

They were most impressive and will return almost everyone who played meaningful minutes.

Look for Louisville in the top five in the next preseason poll. They’ll be that good. Wayne Blackshear will be a force.

Down by nine at the half, Kansas had Ohio State right where they wanted them…or so it seemed.

Don’t forget, with less than five minutes left in the first half, Kansas had more turnovers (eight) than field goals (seven) and was shooting 29 percent.

Ohio State missed their first 10 shots from the field in the second half and KU was off to the races.

Foul trouble for OSU’s Deshaun Thomas was a break for Kansas. Kansas is nothing if not opportunistic---ask Purdue and UNC, and now OSU. They never waste a break or opening.

KU’s Thomas Robinson played at a higher level than everybody else on the floor.

Kansas center Jeff Withey showed why he was named Big 12 defensive player of the year---he had seven blocks on Saturday night to give him 27 in five NCAA tournament games.

Can’t forget the free throws by Travis Releford with about three minutes to go…that’s rising to the occasion.

It was the fifth straight game that a Kansas opponent shot worse than 30 percent in the final five minutes, including 0-for-7 by North Carolina in the regional final.

OSU’s Aaron Craft was incredible. Some times it appeared there had to be more than one of him on the floor---he was everywhere at once.

Tonight the good folks from The Worldwide Leader will broadcast the Women’s Final Four. All four team are #1 seeds. UConn/Notre Dame will be a beauty. I hope Stanford clobbers Baylor. I would love to see a UConn/Stanford finale. Watching Geno is a treat.

Not so fast: That nine-point halftime Kansas deficit was the second-largest halftime deficit overcome in a national semifinal.

One more thing: Grading the two games, I say you have to give UK and KU each an A-Plus---and Louisville and OSU an A-Minus. It was a singular night of basketball, one that showcased four teams that deserved the spotlight.

As Kansas Coach Bill Self said (paraphrasing here), “Every team had to play 40 minutes tonight.”

A night to be savored.

Welcome to Bracketville---Final Four Tip Off Edition

It's remarkable, but Tyshawn Taylor has not made a single three-pointer during this tournament. That's 0-for-17 and counting. In fact, Taylor has never made a three-pointer in a dome in his entire career.Of the 33 titles contested since seeding the field began in 1979, 17 were won by #1 seeds (51.5%)

Anthony Davis has put up some remarkable numbers this season, but this one might the most remarkable of all: One. That's the number of times he has fouled out. In fact, there have only been three occasions when Davis committed as many as four fouls -- and none since Dec. 10 in the loss to Indiana.

During the NCAA tournament, Louisville has committed 15 fewer turnovers than their opponents.

Louisville made just 31.7 percent of their three-point attempts during the season, which was ranked 14th in the Big East and 272nd in the country. During the NCAA tournament, they have made 39 percent.

The Kentucky/Louisville match-up is the first in-state pairing in the Final Four since Penn State/LaSalle in 1954.

For the Duke women, next season looks promising. Their top six scorers return (five had double digit averages). And, they bring in the fifth rated recruiting class, including a pair of McDonald All-Americans.

In every quadrant of the Sweet Sixteen, the higher ranked defensive team won.

Not so fast: Didjaknow that Duke and UNC have never met in the NCAA Tournament?

One more thing: From his Skyped press conference to his NBA announcement, UNC’s Harrison Barnes has never shown much in the way of humility. The NBA, however, has a habit of teaching it to everyone except for a highly select few. He’ll get his share soon enough.

I have been noodling around with the Leader Board methodology…trying to figure out a better way.

Currently, there are fewer points available per round as we go deeper into the tournament. Some how that seems off kilter.

There should be a greater reward for advancing correctly. The latter rounds ought to be worth as much as the early one.

To do that, a more geometric progression of points-per-game (ppg) seems the way to go.

So, next year I thought each round should be worth a total of 32 points…making the games worth 1,2,4,8,16 and 32 if you have the champion.

Currently, the points available per round decrease after the second round. Total-points-possible rise from 120 to 192.

As you can see, not much changes in the standings, but the payoff for better results in the Sweet Sixteen and beyond will be deservedly higher. I think you’ll still need to have the ultimate winner to win the blue ribbon.

What’s your take?

This year, the winner gets a copy of “The Last Great Game: Duke vs. Kentucky and the 2.1 Seconds That Changed Basketball” by Gene Wojciechowski.

Welcome to Bracketville---Final Four Set Edition

When the final horn sounded in St. Louis, Eddie took over the lead from Tony by a point (69-68) and Carl has 65. The maximum possible in the final three games: Eddie 85, Carl 81 and Tony 73.

Kansas and Kentucky both beat the spread.

The Westwood One/Dial Global Sports Radio broadcast of the Kentucky/Baylor game was a treat. The delay was just about one second, so the action on the screen and play-by-play went off pretty much without a hitch.

As an analyst, Coach John Thompson Jr. shows what a difference a pro makes as opposed to an abject amateur like Clark Kellogg.

Coach JT Jr. is barely a silly millimeter behind Coach Knight in my book. I learned a lot listening to his remarks.

A priceless one was his comment on the difference between a blow and a rest. “A blow is when I take out a player who has played well and hard and needs a break. A rest is when I’m mad at a player and I cover him with a blanket because he’s sitting for a long time.”

I loved his summation on how a team advances in the Tournament, “It’s not necessarily the best team that wins; it’s the team that’s playing best that game.”

In the opening minutes, when Baylor’s Quincy Acey drew his flagrant one foul, Coach JT Jr. wondered why the refs had to check the monitor by saying, “Even Ray Charles could see that one.”

That’s an old chestnut that always brings a grin to my face---so I am the last person on the face of the earth to take offense.

Imagine if Bobby Knight or another white announcer had made that comment. The professional liberals and race hustlers from Jackson to Sharpton to PMSNBC to Media Matters would be screaming for a firing or a trip to the stockade in the public square a la Don Imus.

In the game, Kentucky was faster, quicker, smarter, more aggressive and more athletic. They were bad news for the Bears. Kentucky goes marching in to New Orleans.

Was the crowd for the final ten minutes of the Kansas victory over UNC great or what?

Earlier in the week (it’s spring break in Central Florida) I was behind a college kid wearing a Kansas tee shirt at Publix. I asked him how he thought the team would do. He just looked at me and said, “Rock, chalk, Jayhawk.”

Enough said!

Kansas certainly did just that in final 3:07.

That was a helluva finish in a very exciting ball game. The first half was really entertaining.

Carolina was just 2-of-17 from 3-point range. The Tar Heels shot just 22.6 percent overall in the second half.

The second half was nail-biting time. Just a lot of fun, especially for those of us with Kansas going to the Final Four.

KU’s game against Ohio State on Saturday will mark the second time the Jayhawks and Buckeyes have played this season. Kansas won the first meeting 78-67 in Lawrence, but OSU’s forward Jared Sullinger didn't play because of back spasms.

KU’s Thomas Robinson has averaged 12.5 rebounds during the tournament.

Not so fast: Meanwhile, back at the ESPN Tournament Challenge, just 0.4% of the brackets had all four correct in their Final Four…9.3% of us have three correct. I’m number 1,045,641 out of 6.45 million. That’s a big helping of humble pie to go.

One more thing: I thought it was impossible to have a uniform uglier than the neon green monstrosities Baylor wore in their first three games. However, the repulsive black ones with neon-greenish-yellow set a new standard in tacky bad taste.